chasing dandelions...

I am sorry.

I am sorry for saying that the phrase “die cis scum” is immature, and that so many people took that as a personal attack against all trans* people.

I am sorry that I offended people with my post.

I am sorry my words were taken as trying to police, control, silence, or belittle trans* individuals who use and support the phrase. That was not my intent.

I am sorry that some of the examples in my post were triggering and upsetting. I did include trigger warnings with the post, but that doesn’t change the fact that the examples were upsetting and perhaps not necessary.

I am sorry the post was seen as a cis person trying to dictate what trans* people can and cannot say. That was not my intent. I wanted to express my opinion on what I (still) feel is a violent phrase, but I didn’t mean for it to come across as trying to assert any sort of authority over the trans* community.

I am sorry so many people felt I was invalidating their experiences with violence and oppression. Your experiences and reactions are valid. I have said that more times than I can count. I do not and will not agree with the use of the phrase, but I recognize it IS a valid response. It IS an understandable response. And for some people, it is very empowering.

I am sorry parts of my post came off and flippant and dismissive. On rereading it, I can certainly see how my words could be viewed that way. I should have done a better job expressing myself. I should have thought more carefully about what I was saying and how I was saying it.

I am sorry that the way I expressed my opinion made people feel under attack, disrespected, marginalized, unheard, offended, or silenced.

And I am sorry if my responses to the flood of hate I have received in any way further alienated people in the trans* community. I have no desire to further compound the pain, violence, oppression, hate, or marginalization trans* people face everyday.

I know my position as a cis person makes my judgment and perspective on any trans* issue far more privileged. While I do watch what my trans* loved one go through on a daily basis, I am not personally experiencing it, which puts me leaps and bounds ahead of them already. I am more emotionally “removed” (for lack of a better word) from the experiences of trans* people and therefore have the privilege of reacting less impulsively/instinctively, with less emotion and less anger. Expecting others to be able to do the same is inappropriate given my position of privilege.

So, I am sorry. The original post has been removed. I appreciate the feedback I received from both people who agree and those who disagree with me. But given how upsetting the post clearly was to so many people, I have chosen to delete it out of respect and concern.

Sincerely,

Lauren